I’m back. (That was fast, eh?) Oh, I’ve known the end of the Family Way was coming for a looooong time. I’m considering various vehicles for exit of certain kinship bonds that have become destructive and a threat to my well-being. I’m already feeling the beginnings of Better Health…
My place is HERE, in my country, or wherever I end up, in more than one “home,” more than one abode, whatever. I am called to do whatever I can, by whatever means I am able, for however long it takes, for whatever it costs, to bring down this oligarch psychotard attack on Humanity and on the very Earth that sustains us and all the rest of the living beings, whether critter, plant, rocks… Whatever is part of the Earth, that is where this contest is playing out… To do what I need for myself, and to help others who actually want my help.
I need to find my Working Army and enlist.
I understand that in working on building my own strengths, I am building the overall strength of All. It’s been a long-time personal struggle for me… Learning (over and over) how to NOT try and help those who don’t want, or cannot accept, my help. It’s not about me, it’s about them. I’m okay with me, generally speaking. I’m no saint, I’m not finished on MY journey, but I know who I am.
I cannot continue to beat my head against a brick wall of family insanity— or to allow my siblings to beat my head against their greed, control issues, and hatred. I kept thinking, “These are MY parents! I can’t abandon them!” But I also can’t rescue them. So, my resistance to the Evil actually made things worse. What is “right” doesn’t always work out the way we think it will or should.
My motto has become this: Resist Not Evil: Work Around It.
Now I have to learn what that means, and how to use it.
This is the culmination of a lifetime of heartbreak, spiritual abuse, physical threat, emotional attack, pain and deprivation… There is no winning this Family War. I can only be thankful that suffering is now short-term, and that this is the END of our line. And without me in the mix, maybe the wildly vibrating alarm flags can relax a bit, and the Great Spirit can do what I could not, whatever that means.
My decision is coming through a few filters, so that I can restore my own well-being and my own fortitude for the coming engagement. It’s going to be the biggest CONTEST for the choice between “Good and Evil” that we’ve ever known. I want to be in it. I DON’T want to be in a family struggle that is radiating insanity and destruction, one that not only can I not fix, but that is causing me great harm.
I learned in my training to be an EMT that one does not just run into a situation that could be perilous… First assess the situation and make sure YOU, the rescuer, are not going to become another victim. I kept disregarding this training because This was Family. All the more reason to consider it, I realize now.
It’s long been a conscious idea, since 2020, that I want to be part of something that has a good chance of SUCCESS. My family— well, it’s a lost cause, it seems, as far as this life, and on this plane. I trust the Great Spirit to heal the sickness and despair that is part of this turn through the karmic wheel. It’s not MY job to fix it. I see that now. I’ve seen it for a long time, really, but I couldn’t bring myself to accept it. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. But I feel that I am called to be elsewhere.
Oracles come in many shapes and sizes. Mine appeared in an unexpected way and in an unexpected form, and I recognized it immediately. You know those corny movies where the clouds part, and the sun comes through like some kind of divine revelation? It wasn’t like that at all. It was mundane and could have easily been dismissed, ignored, brushed aside. But no— Here, I turn a page.
There are few times when this dog can only be quite serious; I am sad, and yet, I feel a relief, I feel a kind of impending JOY that I lost some time back, the beginnings of an awareness that I’ve chosen the healthier way— to stop trying to mend something that is forever broken, not within my power to heal it— and I must stop dragging around the idea that it’s MY duty, MY job, MY responsibility. My inner knowledge of this impossible task, that it IS impossible, has been dragging me down. It’s time to free up my soul, and to be part of the Bigger Picture, and to be part of this Greater Experience… whatever that means. I don’t have to be the one, I want to be a PART of The One. It’s time to finally accept the idea that I cannot fix everything, but I can work with others toward a better life.
I’m introducing a New Cartoon Series of mine: TALKING HEADS.
You live on the opposite coast from me, but I wish you lived next door!
I've been fortunate to have good relations with my parents and sister. We'd have been friends even if we weren't related. Both my parents, however, had not been so fortunate- much treachery and other problems with their parents and siblings. But, they raised me and my sister right ! We learned by their example of the difference between "family and "relatives." My parents had some friends who were like "family" and treated as such, as well as a couple actual family members who deserved that honor. The difficult, treacherous "relatives" were kept at arm's length, and we kids learned early that, in talking to them it was "name, rank and serial number, don't drink behind enemy lines"
Just knowing the difference between "family" and "relative" makes all the difference, and eases that unreciprocated sense of duty so many people feel. That, and some good outlets for relieving stress are so helpful. For me, it's my gardening - including my favorite machine, the brush chipper. It's very satisfying to shred up a pile of tangled mess and transform it into something that helps grow pretty flowers in the garden. That chipper (and the one I had before that I wore out) is an awesome therapist. Just a couple hours with it and my mind is like a tranquil spring-fed pool. If only I could pop all the evil tangles in our world into that chipper!
These strategies have kept me a bit eccentric, but fully grounded and sane in our insane and banal modern society.
Great article. Thanks. I have through similar things with friends and family.
And I have spent a lot of time trying something like this quote from your article. "I need to find my Working Army and enlist."
Noting that our enemy is adept at creating problems and then setting up controlled opposition, I have learned to be highly skeptical of any existing Working Army. Armies have a command structure. Command structures are easily set up and controlled my our enemy, which is adept at using bribes and threats to keep its puppet commanders in line.
My conclusion is that enlisting subjects the person to enslavement in a dictatorship with a requirement to follow orders. I will never lead or follow again. My belief is that the enemy can easily monitor, manipulate and control leaders and followers.
You may discover, like me, that independent, free thinking, critical thinking partners, who do not have a command structure, but can be effective alone or together, are a great alternative to finding an army and enlisting. If you find a great army. please let me know. I was initially optimistic but I searched high and low, and never did find it.
This is still relevant. The longer, full version. It has a rather complete description of our enemy and how it operates. https://youtu.be/pfzJaLXujTE
I am interested in this area of TX. What do you think of it?
https://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-search/Van-Horn_TX/beds-1/baths-1/type-single-family-home,mfd-mobile-home,farms-ranches/price-na-400000/lot-sqft-87120/pnd-hide/sby-6?view=map&pos=31.611031,-104.840485,29.542136,-102.744843,9&qdm=true