You live on the opposite coast from me, but I wish you lived next door!
I've been fortunate to have good relations with my parents and sister. We'd have been friends even if we weren't related. Both my parents, however, had not been so fortunate- much treachery and other problems with their parents and siblings. But, they raised me and my sister right ! We learned by their example of the difference between "family and "relatives." My parents had some friends who were like "family" and treated as such, as well as a couple actual family members who deserved that honor. The difficult, treacherous "relatives" were kept at arm's length, and we kids learned early that, in talking to them it was "name, rank and serial number, don't drink behind enemy lines"
Just knowing the difference between "family" and "relative" makes all the difference, and eases that unreciprocated sense of duty so many people feel. That, and some good outlets for relieving stress are so helpful. For me, it's my gardening - including my favorite machine, the brush chipper. It's very satisfying to shred up a pile of tangled mess and transform it into something that helps grow pretty flowers in the garden. That chipper (and the one I had before that I wore out) is an awesome therapist. Just a couple hours with it and my mind is like a tranquil spring-fed pool. If only I could pop all the evil tangles in our world into that chipper!
These strategies have kept me a bit eccentric, but fully grounded and sane in our insane and banal modern society.
Mar 10, 2023·edited Mar 10, 2023Liked by The Word Herder
Great article. Thanks. I have through similar things with friends and family.
And I have spent a lot of time trying something like this quote from your article. "I need to find my Working Army and enlist."
Noting that our enemy is adept at creating problems and then setting up controlled opposition, I have learned to be highly skeptical of any existing Working Army. Armies have a command structure. Command structures are easily set up and controlled my our enemy, which is adept at using bribes and threats to keep its puppet commanders in line.
My conclusion is that enlisting subjects the person to enslavement in a dictatorship with a requirement to follow orders. I will never lead or follow again. My belief is that the enemy can easily monitor, manipulate and control leaders and followers.
You may discover, like me, that independent, free thinking, critical thinking partners, who do not have a command structure, but can be effective alone or together, are a great alternative to finding an army and enlisting. If you find a great army. please let me know. I was initially optimistic but I searched high and low, and never did find it.
This is still relevant. The longer, full version. It has a rather complete description of our enemy and how it operates. https://youtu.be/pfzJaLXujTE
I am interested in this area of TX. What do you think of it?
Always a delightful read, despite the hardship you have endured and are now ready to release. As Peggy Hall says, "There is always another way." When it comes to family trauma/drama, it's best to remove oneself from the fray, but be available for the ones who come to you for genuine relationship care. As soon as I graduated high school, I started moving further and further from home. When I announced that I was leaving the Midwest altogether and moving to California, my mother was heartbroken. She tried to pin the responsibility for that heartbreak, for her anger, her envy, on me. I refused that "gift." Being far away from my family members came at a cost, of course, but I had to leave the area where I would always be viewed the way they wanted to see me, not as who I really am. And I am happy for you, though I know it has been and is challenging, to decide to take care of yourself. We each must make that decision, or continue slogging unconsciously through the ancestral trauma.💖
Mar 10, 2023·edited Mar 11, 2023Liked by The Word Herder
I'm going through a very gutting and painful breakup with my 36 yr old daughter who has shut me out of her and my 12 yr old grand daughter's life because of ......
......
.......
Pronouns. 🙄
And because of her dad and my opinions on 10 yr olds coming out as gay and also for the scamdemic (she's triple poked last I knew, and has gotten her child jabbed as well).
Not that we ever spoke about anything that she didn't agree on in front of her or the grandie. We walked on eggshells. For this exact reason.
So the kicker? She read her dad's short bio on Twatter. It said: FUCK your pronouns. Social media made her flip out and come unpinned. A place she knows damn well better than to look. She went looking for a fight and found something. That was Dec 6. We've never gone more than a few hours mad at each other.
It's heartbreaking but I know what you're going through somewhat. And also know it's not up to me, it's out of my hands.
She'll grow up, or she won't, but I'm not the sick one and I can't help her be *not sick* until she sees that she's being manipulated by tptb.
Sorry for the essay.
Keep fighting the good fight! There's lots of us in your (army)pack ready to do what we need to. ❤️
Mar 10, 2023·edited Mar 10, 2023Liked by The Word Herder
This word; vitriol, came up in my mind, being what has transpired for you personally and for all of us who have resisted this insane push.
vĭt′rē-ōl″, -əl noun
Any of various sulfates of metals, such as ferrous sulfate, zinc sulfate, or copper sulfate.
Bitterly abusive feeling or expression.
It is a very beautiful color, vitriol is, a very bright blue color like the Mediterranean, though I haven't dipped a toe in it in this lifetime, like pictures of, I guess. So I take with me the beautiful color of vitriol in place of the other meaning.
Not hardly - I'm sure I could give you some stiff competition for that title - and I have way more experience. I think you're dealing with issues you'd be happy not to have to deal with. As painful as it is, sometimes you just have to save yourself. Doesn't mean you stop loving your parents. I have someone in my life too I watch destroying himself. It hurts to watch, but there's nothing I can do if he's not willing to make the effort for himself. Not exactly the same - but I do have a sister I didn't speak to for 20 years because of her toxicity toward me. Even though we've reconciled and she's improved with age (and hopefully so have I), I don't think to this day she understands why why two of her sisters, 3 nieces and a nephew refused to have a relationship with her. I think she still probably thinks it's our limitation, not hers. Since I submitted a newsletter, I'm getting newsletters, including yours, again. I wasn't when I wasn't writing. I'm wondering if you received my newsletter? Let's talk soon - maybe Monday?
My belief system tells me that we choose our families prior to our birth. One way or another, for better or for worse, they help us to find our path. That doesn't mean we must dedicate our lives to them. Who would you be if your family was different? If you made different choices?
I do understand the pain in leaving the army of ones family. They tend to be there for you......and then not. I am suffering also in this area to some degree. Ultimately, 'we are not our brothers/sisters keeper', a famous person once said. I can see you are kind and thoughtful, no saint...thank god. You have a much bigger family/army to deal with now, to focus on. Let's continue marching. Mr Cohen said, 'the wise man said follow me, as he walked behind'. I hope to travel your way in the spring.
I'm happy you are getting out of your situation. I know there will be times that it'll be hard, (If you're "normal." 😉) but you know that you have many SS friends (and their dogs) that love you and are pulling for you.
You live on the opposite coast from me, but I wish you lived next door!
I've been fortunate to have good relations with my parents and sister. We'd have been friends even if we weren't related. Both my parents, however, had not been so fortunate- much treachery and other problems with their parents and siblings. But, they raised me and my sister right ! We learned by their example of the difference between "family and "relatives." My parents had some friends who were like "family" and treated as such, as well as a couple actual family members who deserved that honor. The difficult, treacherous "relatives" were kept at arm's length, and we kids learned early that, in talking to them it was "name, rank and serial number, don't drink behind enemy lines"
Just knowing the difference between "family" and "relative" makes all the difference, and eases that unreciprocated sense of duty so many people feel. That, and some good outlets for relieving stress are so helpful. For me, it's my gardening - including my favorite machine, the brush chipper. It's very satisfying to shred up a pile of tangled mess and transform it into something that helps grow pretty flowers in the garden. That chipper (and the one I had before that I wore out) is an awesome therapist. Just a couple hours with it and my mind is like a tranquil spring-fed pool. If only I could pop all the evil tangles in our world into that chipper!
These strategies have kept me a bit eccentric, but fully grounded and sane in our insane and banal modern society.
Great article. Thanks. I have through similar things with friends and family.
And I have spent a lot of time trying something like this quote from your article. "I need to find my Working Army and enlist."
Noting that our enemy is adept at creating problems and then setting up controlled opposition, I have learned to be highly skeptical of any existing Working Army. Armies have a command structure. Command structures are easily set up and controlled my our enemy, which is adept at using bribes and threats to keep its puppet commanders in line.
My conclusion is that enlisting subjects the person to enslavement in a dictatorship with a requirement to follow orders. I will never lead or follow again. My belief is that the enemy can easily monitor, manipulate and control leaders and followers.
You may discover, like me, that independent, free thinking, critical thinking partners, who do not have a command structure, but can be effective alone or together, are a great alternative to finding an army and enlisting. If you find a great army. please let me know. I was initially optimistic but I searched high and low, and never did find it.
This is still relevant. The longer, full version. It has a rather complete description of our enemy and how it operates. https://youtu.be/pfzJaLXujTE
I am interested in this area of TX. What do you think of it?
https://www.realtor.com/realestateandhomes-search/Van-Horn_TX/beds-1/baths-1/type-single-family-home,mfd-mobile-home,farms-ranches/price-na-400000/lot-sqft-87120/pnd-hide/sby-6?view=map&pos=31.611031,-104.840485,29.542136,-102.744843,9&qdm=true
https://imgflip.com/gif/7e1dg6
Always a delightful read, despite the hardship you have endured and are now ready to release. As Peggy Hall says, "There is always another way." When it comes to family trauma/drama, it's best to remove oneself from the fray, but be available for the ones who come to you for genuine relationship care. As soon as I graduated high school, I started moving further and further from home. When I announced that I was leaving the Midwest altogether and moving to California, my mother was heartbroken. She tried to pin the responsibility for that heartbreak, for her anger, her envy, on me. I refused that "gift." Being far away from my family members came at a cost, of course, but I had to leave the area where I would always be viewed the way they wanted to see me, not as who I really am. And I am happy for you, though I know it has been and is challenging, to decide to take care of yourself. We each must make that decision, or continue slogging unconsciously through the ancestral trauma.💖
Welcome back Jaan.
I'm going through a very gutting and painful breakup with my 36 yr old daughter who has shut me out of her and my 12 yr old grand daughter's life because of ......
......
.......
Pronouns. 🙄
And because of her dad and my opinions on 10 yr olds coming out as gay and also for the scamdemic (she's triple poked last I knew, and has gotten her child jabbed as well).
Not that we ever spoke about anything that she didn't agree on in front of her or the grandie. We walked on eggshells. For this exact reason.
So the kicker? She read her dad's short bio on Twatter. It said: FUCK your pronouns. Social media made her flip out and come unpinned. A place she knows damn well better than to look. She went looking for a fight and found something. That was Dec 6. We've never gone more than a few hours mad at each other.
It's heartbreaking but I know what you're going through somewhat. And also know it's not up to me, it's out of my hands.
She'll grow up, or she won't, but I'm not the sick one and I can't help her be *not sick* until she sees that she's being manipulated by tptb.
Sorry for the essay.
Keep fighting the good fight! There's lots of us in your (army)pack ready to do what we need to. ❤️
This word; vitriol, came up in my mind, being what has transpired for you personally and for all of us who have resisted this insane push.
vĭt′rē-ōl″, -əl noun
Any of various sulfates of metals, such as ferrous sulfate, zinc sulfate, or copper sulfate.
Bitterly abusive feeling or expression.
It is a very beautiful color, vitriol is, a very bright blue color like the Mediterranean, though I haven't dipped a toe in it in this lifetime, like pictures of, I guess. So I take with me the beautiful color of vitriol in place of the other meaning.
Not hardly - I'm sure I could give you some stiff competition for that title - and I have way more experience. I think you're dealing with issues you'd be happy not to have to deal with. As painful as it is, sometimes you just have to save yourself. Doesn't mean you stop loving your parents. I have someone in my life too I watch destroying himself. It hurts to watch, but there's nothing I can do if he's not willing to make the effort for himself. Not exactly the same - but I do have a sister I didn't speak to for 20 years because of her toxicity toward me. Even though we've reconciled and she's improved with age (and hopefully so have I), I don't think to this day she understands why why two of her sisters, 3 nieces and a nephew refused to have a relationship with her. I think she still probably thinks it's our limitation, not hers. Since I submitted a newsletter, I'm getting newsletters, including yours, again. I wasn't when I wasn't writing. I'm wondering if you received my newsletter? Let's talk soon - maybe Monday?
My belief system tells me that we choose our families prior to our birth. One way or another, for better or for worse, they help us to find our path. That doesn't mean we must dedicate our lives to them. Who would you be if your family was different? If you made different choices?
I do understand the pain in leaving the army of ones family. They tend to be there for you......and then not. I am suffering also in this area to some degree. Ultimately, 'we are not our brothers/sisters keeper', a famous person once said. I can see you are kind and thoughtful, no saint...thank god. You have a much bigger family/army to deal with now, to focus on. Let's continue marching. Mr Cohen said, 'the wise man said follow me, as he walked behind'. I hope to travel your way in the spring.
It seems many situations in our lives are made for us to escape from. Good luck with the next project Jaan, looking forward to it!
I'm happy you are getting out of your situation. I know there will be times that it'll be hard, (If you're "normal." 😉) but you know that you have many SS friends (and their dogs) that love you and are pulling for you.