Last time I let you do your “SOS” and then slam me down.
You keep telling me, over and over and over
That I am not worthy, I am not worth it.
How many times, how many times, over decades?
Not all those years ago, not now, not ever.
I chose not to follow my better judgment, out of compassion, and you took advantage, again and again.
WHY in hell do I keep thinking we can connect, when it’s very evident that you do not want to connect, you want to be served, and your sons are so jealous, so petty, nothing now but malicious…
Cruel. THEY are of you. And you are of your family hell.
I never did belong with you, that much was always clear.
And you showed me that, over and over and over.
I am leaving. I am leaving.
No more poor little dead doves on the altar.
I am leaving. I am leaving.
I am not your possession, I am not yours, I am not ofyou.
I'm never going to escape this net of Need and with both front paws tied behind me, it's hard to fix a damn thing. I am trying to learn to LET GO, but my family doesn't want me to... Shit has to change. ALL shit changes, it can't steam forever...
Nov 16, 2022·edited Nov 16, 2022Liked by The Word Herder
It's taken my whole life to learn. I'm still expected to jump when told. I just don't/won't anymore. I still feel guilty, but assure myself it's NOT me that's the problem. It took a fake epidemic to grow my balls. No matter what, I thank God for making me stronger. My "family," now, is a bunch of unknown strangers on "Substack." Thank-you all for "listening" when I "speak." --- On a brighter note, I "met" a dog that looks VERY much like the one in today's pic, at Goodwill this evening. She is a therapy dog in training. Her owner got her 2 hours before Betty White died. Her name is, Betty White. She's a huge love bug, silly, stubborn, people loving, who wants to interact with everyone. She has beautiful blue eyes. Her owner is a very lucky person. (Edited for typos.)
DAMN, Peeps, it's dragging ON AND ON... Typical.
I'm never going to escape this net of Need and with both front paws tied behind me, it's hard to fix a damn thing. I am trying to learn to LET GO, but my family doesn't want me to... Shit has to change. ALL shit changes, it can't steam forever...
It's taken my whole life to learn. I'm still expected to jump when told. I just don't/won't anymore. I still feel guilty, but assure myself it's NOT me that's the problem. It took a fake epidemic to grow my balls. No matter what, I thank God for making me stronger. My "family," now, is a bunch of unknown strangers on "Substack." Thank-you all for "listening" when I "speak." --- On a brighter note, I "met" a dog that looks VERY much like the one in today's pic, at Goodwill this evening. She is a therapy dog in training. Her owner got her 2 hours before Betty White died. Her name is, Betty White. She's a huge love bug, silly, stubborn, people loving, who wants to interact with everyone. She has beautiful blue eyes. Her owner is a very lucky person. (Edited for typos.)