This morning, the second court hearing.
I’m now branded, publicly, as someone untrustworthy, with possible nefarious intent, a thief, potentially, or maybe already. Permanently stained.
I realized as the judge said I was “restrained” from being involved in my parents’ finances, that even if I can quickly get a job when it’s not happened for MONTHS, and even if my brother moves out of my parents’ house (he’s spent his money on grinding me into hamburger), and even if I can move in, this will never end.
So, I’m done. I recognize defeat. I see no alternative here.
I don’t know where I’ll go or what I’ll do. I am stunned and broken.
My brothers are spies, and maybe they’re part of my readership, but even if they’re not, I say to them Never More. I disown you. I really can’t feel any love for you at all, and I’m not going to keep coming back for you to grind me up and beat me down.
I’m heartsick that I’ll probably not see my parents again. It’s very difficult, because even though we’ve had our times of contention, it’s never felt like this. My mother and I had come so far, so I guess that was all we get, that little time of understanding. I love them and I know they love me, but they are being manipulated and it will only continue.
All during this time of assault on me, my mother kept calling me and promising she would “fix” it. Promised me I’d never be homeless, promised to give me some money to help out, promised she’d talk to my brothers. But my brother, the one who lives there now, the impetus of all this, the root— he has been hammering on them ALL WEEK, playing on their fears, creating this whole fiasco. It will never stop.
I’m living a nightmare. I can’t wake up. No light in this tunnel.
I'm up in Canada and I'm living alone with no obligations to anyone who needs me, so take this in the spirit of well-meant advice from somebody who's very out of the fray and maybe has a nerve commenting ... But it sounds like you can't afford to continue this fight, materially or emotionally. And it also seems to me, an outsider, that from what you've been saying the continuation of the fight will only hurt and confuse and upset your parents more than if you'd just given up and let your brother have his way. It sounds callous and maybe it is, but it looks like that's all you can do.
You're in a town where you will not get employment enough to even live, let alone fund a drawn out legal battle. There has to be a better town for you to look for work. It sounded like where you were living before was more congenial. At least it's worth trying to find a better area for your skills and which doesn't have so much restrictions. Some less Washington Woke place? What's the use to anybody of you wearing yourself out and impoverishing yourself?
They way to help your parents maybe is for you to get financial stability and emotional strength so that you can offer help if it's needed? Bury the hatchet with your brother, tell him you trust his good intentions. Tell your mom you need to move out and get better work elsewhere. And for the sake of peace and quiet you'll stop this fight. And move out of that town. What's the use of you bashing your life against the rocks? There's a better life for you! These are the years for you to live. Go get freedom. You deserve it and you can't help anybody else by sinking down to their level.
I don't understand, how did they prove this claim on you? I thought it was just their hearsay and why didn't your mom get to testify?
I can't stand the judicial system, it lacks so much common sense, because law is written by word salad OCD types.
You can probably appeal.